4th March 2024


(Editor’s Word, this letter was written earlier than Doc’s loss of life in August, 2020 however nonetheless related as Doc’s rules are timeless).

Hey Doc,

I learn your e book and am an avid reader of your column. I’ve a query for you, although, that I haven’t been in a position to reply from studying your supplies.

Sunny is smokin’ sizzling, humorous, outgoing, and just about every thing she does I discover cute. I dated her a couple of yr and a half in the past and after we went out it was nice and Curiosity Stage was excessive on either side. Effectively, I made the error of taking her as much as a buddy’s cottage for a protracted weekend too quickly and issues fell aside. She’s actual flirty with different guys, and jealousy acquired the very best of me. We acquired right into a nasty argument and I by no means referred to as her once more.

I just lately began a brand new class in school and realized that Sunny was additionally enrolled in it. We acquired to speaking each week, flirting once more, and sparking outdated emotions. Sunny took me to a hockey recreation, however we saved it gentle and humorous and pleasant. So I introduced her out to my buddy’s celebration and he or she was throughout me. Nonetheless I saved it gentle, and so did she. We nonetheless flirt after we see one another and there’s undoubtedly some chemistry there.

I do know Sunny is seeing different guys, however I’m seeing different women too, so it’s probably not a giant deal proper now. I want to proceed the connection and get to a extra unique stage with Sunny. However I’m afraid she’s simply main me on and that the one factor she’s considering is having a superb time with all the fellows that throw themselves at her, since like I stated she’s smokin’ sizzling.

So what do you suppose? Is there something I can do to actually hook any such woman? If I proceed to pursue her, I feel I’d fall for her a bit too exhausting, after which if I hear about her and different guys, I’ll break somebody’s legs, ya dig? So my decisions are to let her go, stick round for these “enjoyable” buddy dates, or pursue her with dedication and see if I can hook her so all she needs is the unique take care of me. Thanks for serving to me out.

Randwin – who doesn’t know which method to go together with this one


Hello Randwin,

The primary mistake you made was spending approach an excessive amount of time with this woman firstly. You didn’t give Sunny any time and area to seek out you fascinating – and push her Curiosity Stage via the rafters.

The subsequent factor you probably did flawed was to place her on show for the blockers to have a area day with. To you Psych majors, you must OWN a lady’s coronary heart earlier than you begin working round together with her on weekends and exhibiting her off to your buddies.


However you additionally should ask your self whether or not Sunny is flirting with each male she encounters as a result of she has no Integrity or she doesn’t have excessive Curiosity Stage in you. And why is she flirting together with your buddies? In the event you owned the woman’s coronary heart, she wouldn’t be pulling that crap.

Why are you arguing with Sunny? You shouldn’t be arguing together with her over something. When she began enjoying as much as your so-called buddies, you need to have dropped her proper then and there. The Backside Line Issue says that when she betrays you, you’ll be able to’t belief the woman. She has no Integrity.

All these so-called outdated emotions you sparked while you ended up in Sunny’s class have been your emotions alone, pal. You possibly can’t actually say that this woman has any emotions for you as a result of you don’t have any proof of it other than the truth that she’s flirty. The issue is that she’s flirty with just about every thing that strikes. She took you to a hockey recreation as a result of she was bored that evening and had nothing else to do.

Then, while you connected with Sunny for a second time, you went on a gaggle date together with her once more. Randwin, didn’t you study your lesson while you acquired burned the primary time round?

Once more, the chemistry you consider is there with Sunny solely exists in your thoughts. What has she really carried out to point to you that it’s reciprocal? Nothing a lot that I can see.

It’s not a giant deal that Sunny’s seeing different guys? You’re mendacity, Randwin. You continue to have the hots for this woman and you’ve got them dangerous. And also you simply proved it while you stated you wished to place the clamps on her on a extra unique foundation. Sadly for you, another excuse Sunny took you out is as a result of she wished to get her jollies by dumping you and paying you again for while you dumped her, did you consider that?

Sadly, my buddy, there’s nothing you are able to do to hook this woman. You had your likelihood together with her and it’s gone. Too dangerous for you that you just’ve already fallen for her. And don’t go getting all Macho Boy and threatening to interrupt anyone’s legs. What have I advised you earlier than? You must be like Cary Grant to get the women to fall in love with you.

What are you able to do now? Take Sunny out after which hustle different women when you’re together with her. And when she will get all ticked off at you for not giving her your undivided devotion, inform her she’s too possessive and cease going out together with her.

Face it, man: you’re completed with this woman.

Keep in mind, guys: you get one shot per woman per lifetime.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.